These few days I have been spending my time checking my mail. I hope that I will get good news from my professor or mentor. The fyp is driving me nuts, giving me so many problems since I started it. The lack of Au or gas, machine under service or fully booked is making me so gan chiong with my progress. Had a chat with my professor and it makes me feel more stress - like ya, I still have lotsa to do and yet I can't do anything about it. The more I say to my prof, the more agitated I feel and I also felt like crying. The professor did his best in comforting me like saying "your progress is alright", " I will source for other means", "I will talk to Riko", " Don't worry, its common"... It helped at that point of time when I spoke to him. After I left the room, its as if nothing is solved. Back to square one, feeling lost yet numb. So I shall not care about it anymore.

Haha. Yes. I am here saying that I don't care about it. But can I really stop caring about it? For goodness sake, its 10 aus leh. If I don't do well in it, it will definitely drag my gpa down which, of course, is not what I want. I am here trying to do everything to pull up my gpa. Tried to attend all the lessons in the 1st 2 wks and studied hard for an open book quiz. If there aren't any online lectures available, I would definitely go to school. But the fact that there are, it just makes me feel so lazy to be in school. Hence, I pon school for some days in my 3rd and 4th week. Or rather, I feel that attending school is not equivalent to grades improvement. LOL.

The quiz that I studied was not well done as well. Its all multiple choice qns with 1 mark to a correct ans, -1 mark for an incorrect ans, and 0 mark for no ans. The worse part is, one question may have more than one ans. Boo Hoo. The tutor went through the ans and I got 4 incorrect ans, which means I would have to minus 4 marks. The lost of 3 marks was bcuz I was careless. I read the qn wrongly(thought units of energy was asked but it was units of power) and in the mulitple choices of that qn, 3 ans gave the units of energy. There goes my 3 marks. Sounds very little when I mentioned only 4 marks were minus off. LOL. But there were questions that I left blank and also correct ans that I didn't circle. BOO HOO. The quiz is 20%, maybe I only obtain 10%. You tell me.. how to pull up my gpa. Probably you will tell me to work harder for the next quiz and also the exam. Probably you will tell me to open my eyes bigger so that I wouldn't be so careless. But everyone is also working hard right, then I would have to work harder than them. The thought of pulling up my gpa to a higher grade is making me so stress. But if I don't pull it up, I will feel that wo dui bu qi zi ji. At the meet-my-academic-mentor session, the mentor told me he saw improvements in me and he asked me to keep up the good work. I told him I feel tired even though it was only the 1st wk of school. He say " Come on! Its your last year and a bit more you can get into the next grade! You can do it!" When ppl tell me I can do it, it feels as if I would have to live up to their expectations. It makes everything just harder. If the quiz that I mentioned earlier was taken in my previous uni yrs, it probably wouldn't affect me so much.

As everyone knows, I would like to go into the semiconductor industry. Haha.. Semiconductor industry is hot now here, but after probably like 10 years, maybe a lot of semiconductor companies will be outsourced to other countries due to cheaper labour cost. If I go into this field when I graduate, I would probably have to migrate to the other countries to work. I wouldn't mind going overseas to work for months but for years or maybe be the foreign talent in those countries, hahah.. I don't want la!!!!! I am upset! I am proud to be a Singaporean can... LOL. By that time, I would be around 35 years old, a bit too old to strive hard again? Hahah.. Or Maybe by that time, I would have enough money to set up a shop. Maybe by that time, I can be a housewife. Maybe by that time, I can change my career path and be a teacher. Maybe, I should just be a teacher after I graduate. Maybe I should go into the banking industry. Maybe I should continue to get a masters or phd.. Haiz. Life is full of different paths for you to take, isn't it? We can always choose the path that wasn't chosen, the trade off would be the waste of time and probably money. But as long as you like the path that you took, its worth it! I am really afraid that I can't find a job when I graduate though...


P: Did you watch the rally?
Me: Yup. But I was doing other stuff and the tv was on. Wasn't concentrating la...
P: There is a part about dating agency one. According to the dating agencies, 30 plus years old guys would like 20 plus years old gers. This probably leave the 30 plus year old gers unwanted. You worried not?
Me: Hahaha. I know! But I am currently only 20 plus! And its like must kan feeling onez mah!
P: You want to feel until how long!!!!!!!! Maybe you don't like guys? Hahahaha.
Me: Zzzzz...
P: Or maybe you should just open your eyes bigger and take a loook at everyone around..
Me: Zzzzzz....

I concluded. Its all the national rally's fault that is making everyone is showing concern with this aspect of my life. Zzz..

The Olympics's closing ceremony will be held today at 8pm. I hope it will be as spectacular as the opening ceremony. The badminton matches, table tennis matches, volleyball matches and swimming matches I watched, make me feel inspired to really play/swim better. LOL. Yday when I was playing badminton in the sports hall, there were shoutings from kids at the table tennis area. Haha. The kids were actually shouting after they gained 1 point.. hahah.. copycats lo, imitating the action of the table tennis players at the Olympics when they won a point. LOL. Seems like everyone is influence by the Olympics. Hehe.. I am actually happy that this year's Olympics, was held in China as we are able to watch the live telecast games! hahaha... I am also proud that we were able to see the raising flag of Singapore. There are issues that the players are imported but the players are playing hard for Singapore, isn't it. We should be proud of them and ourselves. I believe the Spore Sports school is also currently training children (probably a lot of Singaporeans too) for the next few Olympics. Hahah. Maybe, we will be able to achieve more medals in the next years! If I was a sportswoman who won the final match, I would probably hug my team mates like mad, luff and cry like mad. LOL. If I was waiting to receive any medals, I would probably cry, when I stand on the podium. Hahha. Anywayz, I'm upset with my blue black toe!!!

-Hong-